Catalonia, Spain

We spent the week before Easter in Spain's Catalonia region, home to Barcelona.  Even though there were spots we wanted to see in Barcelona, we decided we needed more beach and less city on this trip.  So we headed along the coast, in both directions from Barcelona, in search of sun and sangria.  

We rented a car, but quickly learned that a car seat is Woody's worst nightmare.  Which also made being in the car our worst nightmare given his unbelievable screaming.  I guess all of our bicycle riding has taught him the car isn't the answer. 

 We spent a few nights south of Barcelona in the town of Castelldefels.  It wasn't much to write home about, but the drive along the coast line was dramatic and beautiful.  Woody enjoyed playing the sand, and even let us nap in the sun on the beach. 

On a day of nothing but torrential downpours, we took the recommendation of a guide book and headed north to the small isolated town of Cadaques on the French border.  We drove over a steep mountain pass lined with terraced hillside olive groves to find this little gem on the Mediterranean.   

After lots of screaming and rain, and getting frustrated on small Spanish streets, arriving in Cadaques was as if the skies had parted to reveal a little slice of heaven. The gorgeous green sea was peaceful and the white washed buildings with blue doors and windows beckoned us to stay.  The sunshine helped, too.

Little Felix loved the pebbles on the beach.

The town is a little artist enclave. Picasso and Dali and numerous other artists and poets called this home at some point in their careers.  I can see why.  Who couldn't find inspiration in this setting?

 

We loved the architecture and blue details.  

We kept extending our stay, day by day, so that we ended up with no time to see Barcelona.  But that didn't matter.  We had hit Cadaques in it's quiet season, just before the tourists arrive for Easter.  Our sweet little "hostels" were only 65 euros per night and the food in town was delicious.  House paella, sangria and wood fired pizzas.  And compared to Copenhagen prices, it was completely affordable.

 

Cobblestones were a bit tricky for the littlest walker.  But he was willing to traipse down every morning in hopes of mom and dad buying him a croissant.  The coffee was amazing, too.

Eating in Spain with a toddler was a bit tricky, as toddlers aren't usually on the "Spanish schedule."  Woody's dinner time is more like their lunch time, so we usually had a big late lunch and tried to find some things at a grocery store for Woody before he went to bed in his stroller.  That freed us up to eat tapas and drink sangria while he slept! 

We headed back to Barcelona on our final full day.  We didn't have enough time to see the two main sights we wanted to visit, but we did a quick drive by on our way to our bed and breakfast. 

This is what the Sagrada Familia looks like from the backseat of a car. 

 

And Parc Guell.  Oh well, another time. 

Our final night was spent in a beautiful little B&B with this expansive view of Barcelona.  It left us wanting to see what was down there. To be honest, I'd never had much of an inkling to visit Spain before this trip, but it far exceeded what I had imagined and I can't wait to go back someday. I just think it will have to be sans bébé in tow.  Woody is a great traveler, but it's too harrowing to trek around with a little guy who finds danger at every corner.  

Gaining Confidence

He's been threatening to do this for a few months now, but was always too cautious to take those first steps.  Something at the playground today made him throw away his caution and go for a long walk across the asphalt.  We didn't get that one on video, but did get this shorter clip.  

I'm not sure who was more proud, us or him.  Isn't it funny, that, as parents, we are so proud of these milestones that every child will eventually accomplish? 13 months is a fun age though.  In the last month or so he's become more communicative and responsive.  He claps, sings, dances, gives hi-fives and even cleans the floor with rags.  The best part is that he somehow chooses to reach all these big milestones on the weekend when James is around to witness them.  

A Glimpse of Oslo

School in Denmark convenes for a week in February so kids can take a whack at black cats in barrels, leaving James with nothing to do but hang out with the two of us.  It was lovely.  With un-Foss-like perfect timing, we found a sweet deal from Groupon that got us a two night mini-cruise on a DFDS Seaways ship to Norway. 

 We boarded the cruise liner at 4:30 on Monday at the Port of Copenhagen.  Neither of us had ever been on a cruise before, and we both swore we probably never would, but $60 for 2 nights was enough to make us put our scruples aside.  

 The sea was blocks of ices for miles and miles.  The boat itself was something like a 1970s velour Vegas casino, minus the gambling.  Lounge acts, bad buffets and boring duty free shops (who buys that stuff?).  We kept an open mind and enjoyed the view.

 A helicopter made a practice emergency drop not long after we set sail.  It was amazing to watch it hover above the ship and see a little rope come out and a man slither down to the boat deck. 

 Little Felix seemed to love the boat.  He had two ball pits to play in and a pool to swim in.  He also slept really well with the very slight rocking of the ship the first night. 

 The next morning Felix had us up early enough to catch the sunrise (it's not so hard when the sun rises at 7:30 in the north) from the ship.  These views from the deck as we entered the fjord were the highlight of the trip. 

 The Norwegian scenery is breathtaking. 

 It was too cold and windy for the littlest.  

 So instead we had a date in the coffee shop (jammies permitted when you are cruising) and watched the scenery through the window on Valentine's Day.

 For his first birthday, Woody entered his 8th country.  I can't say I did that until my 20s.

The boat made it into port in Oslo at 9:30 the next morning and we had 7 hours to explore before boarding again.  Oslo was cold and the light never really got brighter than this.  In fact, the sun stayed low in the sky all day, never peaking at high noon.   

Oslo is a nice, small city.  It reminded me of a more northerly Portland.  Clean, quiet streets, turn of the century buildings, a green street car and a gray sky.  We visited a castle, had Indian for lunch and then wandered a little more.  We contemplated visiting the viking museum, but opted for letting Woody stretch his legs out of the stroller.  

Funny little electric cars piqued our interest.  I've complained about Denmark being expensive, but it's nothing compared to Oslo.  Our Indian lunch was $40 per person for curry and naan.  A 1 hour validity bus ticket is $10.  

We found a nice local brewery to warm our toes and bought three delicious beers for $43!  Yikes!  

7 hours in Oslo turned out to be just enough for us.  If I were to go back, I'd love to further explore the fjords or get up into the mountains, but no more city for me.  At 4:30 on Tuesday we got back on the ship bound for Copenhagen.  We were happy to return to our little room and watch the view from the warm ship.  That night was super rocky--at times my stomach was seemingly in my throat, making it tough to eat a buffet dinner.  Felix and I took a dip in the pool, I got a few minutes by myself in the sauna, and we went to bed with the waves.  Right on schedule, at 9:30 on Wednesday morning, we arrived back into Copenhagen.  It took us all a little while to find our sea legs after all that rocking. 

Babies in Denmark

Being a baby in Denmark would be a pretty cool gig.  Parks, playgrounds, other babies to play with, cute, organic Scandinavian clothes, fewer required vaccinations and you get to ride a bicycle at an early age!  But being a parent in Denmark has to be an easier gig than anywhere else in the world. 

Babies are everywhere in Denmark.  You can't walk 5 feet in any direction in Denmark without passing a mom walking a sleeping baby in a pram.  Scandinavia is repeatedly touted as the most child friendly part of the world. The baby boom so easily seen in Copenhagen is no wonder when you consider the benefits and resources given to families and children.  

 Working mothers who give birth in Denmark are entitled to 10 months of paid maternity leave by the government.  That's 100% of your salary.  For 10 months.  In addition, those 10 months can be split between the mother and father, with the father allowed to take up to 2 months of paid leave from his work (also at 100% of his salary). Parents are also given 2 calendar days per year for child sick leave.

 At 10 months, most mothers go back to work.  It's rare to see a mom out during the day with a child above the age of 1.  The children then go to government subsidized nursery, known here as vuggestue, for children ages 6 months to 2 years. The care is excellent, with 1 teacher to 3 children, organic home prepared meals and lots of outings (just like these kids above and below).  The cost is about 3,700 DKK/650 USD per month.  Woody will start going part time in April, at which point I'm sure I'll have more to say about Danish daycare.

Every 3 months, parents are given a child benefit of roughly 800 USD deposited directly into your account to cover child expenses.  This is a perk we are fortunate to receive (however, when you consider the high tax rate, it's hard to say if it's really a perk?).

Breastfeeding is encouraged and widely done by mothers in Denmark.  In 8 months here, I've never seen a mother use a Hooter Hider or any other sort of cover up, as nursing in public is common and nothing to be ashamed of.  Surprisingly, there are no laws like in the US that protect the right to nurse in public. It is, however, forbidden to advertise infant formula brands in Denmark.

 The most ubiquitous baby symbol in Denmark has to be the pram.  I was shocked by their size and prevalence when we arrived last August.  Every Danish mother has one and every Danish baby spends a vast majority of their first year of life in this pram.  Designed to grow with the child from newborn to age 3, these old school style prams truly are the Danish mom's Suburban.  

 Look closely...can you see the designated pram parking in this department store cafeteria?  These bedrooms-on-wheels have all the bells and whistles: small bassinets for removing a sleeping baby, sun shades, shocks, all-terrain wheels for snow and ice, rain covers, brakes, locks, pillows, duvets, leather covers, adjustable handles, and even matching diaper bags.  New prams cost upwards of 1000 USD.  Some are literally as big and cumbersome as an SUV.  I secretly question whether a little baby needs so much vehicle, but I've learned that child development and parenting philosophy play a large part in their popularity.

Aside from protection from the harsh Danish winters, the most obvious reason they are so popular is that they are used for all occasion sleep.  Babies will take most of their naps in these prams, treating it like a second home, as mom's walk and walk to keep them asleep.  A nurse told a friend of mine to take her non-sleeping son out for a 2 hour walk every 2 hours throughout the day!  Babies sleep outside in their prams up until -10 degrees Celsius. Also, Danes believe that children who cannot yet sit up on their own should always lay down flat to ensure proper spinal development.  So that means no car seat for more than an hour, no Bumbo chair, and no baby walkers.  

Not only do babies sleep outside, but they also do so completely unattended!  It is very common to leave a sleeping baby outside on the sidewalk while mothers step inside a cafe or shops. Coming from the US, where fear of abduction is rampant, it is something you truly have to see to believe.  But, as a friend tells us, there was one incident of child abduction back in the 1950's and such an uproar occurred throughout Denmark that the baby was returned within days.  Copenhagen is a safe city, and when you see it happening often, you become accustomed to it yourself.  We once left Woody sleeping outside a shop in his bike trailer.  A man walking down the street heard him wake up and cry and came into the store to find us.  No sweat.  On the flip side, there is a well-told story of a Danish couple who visited New York City and left their child outside a restaurant while they dined, not thinking about the perception of such an act in the US (or, obviously, the safety of NYC???).  The parents were arrested and the child was taken into custody.  

There are lots of sleeping babies in this picture. 

 Among the other benefits of being a baby/mom in Denmark are the multitude of free activities and facilities geared toward moms and babies.  Twice a week we can go to a free indoor playground designed for babies under two years old with baby toys, cars and swings.  Cafes and restaurants almost always have high chairs and changing tables.  Some even have play areas for children, complete with microwave and small kitchen for heating up baby meals.  There are manned outdoor playgrounds offering bikes and cool Danish designed play structures.  This morning, we went to one of the many churches that serve coffee, baked goods and baby singing in a warm place where moms can socialize and let the babies play.  Museums have beautiful interactive children's exhibits and art classes, many of which are free.  There are government subsidized swimming lessons, pre & post-natal yoga classes, baby signing and rhythm classes.

  Then of course, there are the libraries, parks, feeding the ducks at the lakes and hundreds of kilometers of bike paths.  All of these baby perks add up to a society that nourishes and protects its children, while simultaneously respecting the work that mothers and fathers put into raising children.  As non-Danish citizens, we may not receive all the monetary benefits, but we do partake in the others with great joy.  But most importantly, raising a child in another culture has taught us that there are so many good ways to bring up a baby. Some practices make your jaw drop, others just make sense.  James and I are sometimes uncomfortably out on our own as parents in a foreign country, but that distance from home, family and friends also allows us to question common practice in light of new ways.  As a family, we can keep those traditions or practices that are important to us, gain new parenting perspectives from our new homes and discard what seems unnecessary.  Sound idealistic?  Or maybe just confusing to poor little Felix?  Hmm, I think I'll save culture identification for an entirely different future post.   

February Freeze

Thank goodness the cold-snap we had in the middle of February has passed.  For 2 weeks we never once got above freezing.  

It made for some beautiful scenes, though. 

Nyhavn frozen in ice.

Even the sea was frozen for as far as you could see!

We got a few centimeters of snow, enough to draw every child from 0-100 out to play on the small hills in the park across the street from us.

Woody wasn't so sure about the cold white stuff.

He was cranky after the few runs we took.

No such thing as fair-weather cycling in Denmark. 

The cycle tracks are better maintained than the roads!

This week I've heard the birds chirping and the lakes have thawed.  I would like to believe that Spring isn't far away, but the sceptic in me isn't holding out hope.  I've heard it's not nice until June.  

Felix's First

One year ago, on February 13, James and I went for a walk in the park to see the ume blossoms in Tokyo.  Three days past my due date, I remember moving slowly up the hill, stopping to catch my breath often.  I thought it would still be a few days before we got to meet our little baby.

It must have been the spicy curry I ate that day, because less than 12 hours later I was in labor.  On a snowy Valentine's Day night, we met our little guy for the first time.  The sweet Japanese nurses wrapped him in a tiny terry cloth kimono and gave him to use like we knew what to do with him. 

Today, we have this big kid at one year old.  A lot happens in a year.  More than I could have ever thought--from big earth movements to big family moves.  At one year, that little baby we took home in Tokyo is still in there, but he's now grown into a speedy, independent, adventure seeking, slightly stubborn, curious, social and sweet little boy.  

To celebrate that we all made it through a year (even though James and I look like we've aged five years), we threw a party for Woody.  I'd always thought of first birthday parties as more for the parents than the children, but Woody really seemed to enjoy his day.

Like any crazy mom, I tried my hand at baking the cake.  When it failed miserably, I bought these delicious cupcakes.  Everyone was happy.  I did succeed at making cute little cheddar goldfish crackers, though they were a true labor of love I won't be repeating often. 

True to his international roots, little Felix's guests were from around the world: Denmark, Japan, Mexico, Germany, Sweden, Ireland, UK, and the US. 

He was happy to show off his walking skills and push around his new packages.

The cupcake wasn't a quick hit.  In fact, I think he was a bit unnerved by the attention, the singing and the flame.  

But once he got his fingers in that cream cheese frosting and red velvet cake, there was no turning back.

Before we left Tokyo in June, we bought Woody a shinkansen train set.  We set it up for his first birthday and he was in love.

But then he went all Godzilla on it, and we've since had to put it away until he's ready for it. 

Every good party ends with a kiss.  Woody sure knows how to woo the ladies. This is our cute little 5 year old Mexican-Danish neighbor from upstairs.

 It was a good day and Woody is looking forward to doing it all again tomorrow (or next year, whichever comes first).

The Grocery Store

At the risk of sounding like a disgruntled stay-at-home-mother, I'm going to talk about grocery shopping because it is the single most frustrating thing about living in Denmark. Food is a large part of my daily existence (probably yours too?) and getting it is no easy task in Denmark.  Everything from service to price to selection to long, long lines becomes a point of contention, and the reason why I have, more than a handful of times, walked out of a store empty-handed in total frustration.

We live in the city, and city grocery shopping is different than suburban grocery shopping.  It means I have to walk (no big deal) and usually deal with smaller stores with less selection and visit more often.  In most places around the world, people shop daily because the food spoils within a few days.  In Denmark, I go shopping 4-5 days per week, which probably only compounds my dislike for the stores here.  I wish I could say I went so often because the food was amazingly fresh, but no, I can only carry so much when also toting a 20-pound baby. 

The cost of living in Denmark is notoriously high and food gets no break from tax hikes.  On my $40 grocery bill total, I paid over $8 of that in tax.  That's a 25% tax on food on top of the 45% income tax, the $200 bi-yearly media tax, and the $10 per month antenna tax (whether you've got a TV or not)! One has to ask where all this money goes.  

Here's a little sampling of what I bought today and the prices:

approx. 2 sticks of butter = $4 (thanks to the recent addition of the world's first fat tax)

half loaf of whole wheat bread = $3

1 cucumber = $1

10 organic eggs = $5.50

1 liter of yogurt = $3

1 grapefruit = $1

1 avocado = $1.25

1 liter of milk = $2

1 zucchini = $1

Those prices may not look like much individually, but they add up quickly.  We used to pay around $500 per month for groceries in Tokyo, and we are now spending close to $1000 per month. I do believe we should spend a high percentage of our salary on food because it’s not just something that fills our bellies, but it also nourishes our body and soul.  Healthy food=healthy bodies=fewer doctors visits.  Sounds like something a state run health care system would promote and possibly subsidize.  I could get behind the fat tax if the money gained on foods like butter, cheese and meat was used to offset the high cost of fruits and vegetables, but it is not.  It just seems like greediness to me.

I expect to pay more for "exotic" foods that provide me the comfort of cooking food that is known to me, but the prices on these items due to import taxes are criminal: 

1 tube of wasabi paste = $7

10 sheets of nori = $7

small jar of bland salsa = $5

small jar of natural peanut butter (about 1/2 the size of an Adams jar) = $7

half size package of plain tofu = $5

When you consider these items hardly taste anything like the original and are made in neighboring Holland, you begin to realize you are getting ripped off.

But even more frustrating is that I did this shopping at three different stores because you can never count on one store having everything in stock.  I'm not picky.  Basics like grains, vegetables and dairy vary from store to store.  Each store usually only has one or two brands to choose from and will possibly be out of stock of the one you are looking for.  Or it will be out of date!  I know this can happen in remote places where food doesn't turn over quickly, but come on, in the middle of the city?!  Right now, at the dead of winter, the vegetable selection has been reduced to about 10 choices: soggy looking asparagus from Brazil, small potatoes, celery root, big potatoes, onions, gold potatoes, turnips, new potatoes, tasteless hothouse peppers, and a few more varieties of potatoes.  You get the idea.  I promise I'm not being overly dramatic, it's really that sad.  I know it's winter, I know it's best to eat locally grown produce, but I also know from living in Japan that winter does not have to mean a dearth of fresh vegetables.  Japan introduced me to daikon and lotus root, among other lesser known root vegetables, all grown in the winter.  A wealthy country like Denmark should be able to stock more than potatoes in January.

Just like any place, there are high-end stores and low end stores.  Most of my frustration comes when I visit the low-end stores--narrow aisles crowded with palates of un-shelved goods with no room for shopping baskets (let alone a stroller) and terribly, terribly long lines.  You can count on seeing only 1 or 2 checkers at most in a store.  Each line is about 15 people deep, taking 10-15 minutes to get through.  (I use the term "lining up" in Denmark loosely: A new checker opens up?  The 10 people in line behind you peel off and go to the new stand, rather than politely offering the new spot to the person who has already been waiting 10 minutes in front of you.  Grandmas will take your spot if you aren't standing with your nose in the back of the person in front of you. Danes don't do lining up well.) And once you do reach the front of the line, you can expect nothing but the most brusqueness of service.  Danes have a particular brand of customer service.  It goes something like this:  I'm not really bothered by what you need.

I definitely benefit from the high tax rate while living in Copenhagen, but where do we draw the line?  It just seems like too much.  Maybe I'm just extra grumpy because I had to schlep home a heavy bag of food 1/2 a mile while carrying a 20 pound baby and wearing 5 pound winter boots because it's 25 degrees F (-3 C) outside.  Or maybe I'm just a spoiled brat who is used to modern conveniences and needs a little perspective on just how good I have it. 

It's cold here.

 

Really cold.  Up until this month, the winter in Denmark had been quite mild.  But for the last 2 weeks, the temperature has barely gotten above freezing, with most days well below 0 C. 

 

This morning it was -7C/19F when I left with Woody for the day.  The verdict is still out on what's worse in my opinion: staying indoors with a busy baby or getting a busy baby dressed to leave the house in this weather.  This completed winter look took about 30 minutes of chasing and dressing, one layer at a time.  In between layers, he speedily crawls away from me laughing at my growing frustration.  Here he is wearing long underwear, wool pants, a onesie, two long sleeve shirts, two pair of socks, a fleece suit and a baby balaclava.  It's hard work living in a cold climate. 

 All of that dressing for an hour or two at an indoor playground.  At least he is too tired to fight me after all that play when I dress him for the way home.

 

 I've been saving the topic of babies and prams in Denmark for a whole separate post, but this seems like a good time to talk about sleeping in the cold.  Did you know that babies in Denmark sleep outside for naps?  All year round?  The Danish health authority encourages moms to bundle up their babies, rock them in their prams, and leave them in the protected courtyard to sleep up until -10C.  After -10, they finally come inside. Some moms leave a baby monitor in the pram (complete with temperature gauge!) so they can tell when their baby has awakened.  My jaw dropped when I first heard this, but Woody does actually sleep very well in the cold. Unfortunately our courtyard is more like a trash heap, so he sleeps inside where it's warm.